The Disappointment that is Asher Roth

I hate reviews. Movie reviews, music reviews, concert reviews, all of them. Maybe it's because I had to write so many while with the DI. Maybe it's because I used to have a website whose content was solely music reviews, or maybe it's because they are totally irrelevant. People can make their own decisions. They don't need anyone else to tell them what to think or even enjoy for that matter.

HOWEVER

I had to write something today for the mere fact that I am so utterly disappointed. Asher Roth sucks. Or at least his first major debut does.

Seriously, is there a template or formula for shitty rap? I want to know. Does every mainstream rapper subscribe to a shitty rap newsletter? Cause all of you motherfuckers rap about fucking bitches, getting money (or not if you think it's a new idea to talk about not caring about money like Asher Roth - keep in mind anyone that says this has money and is thus lying anyways), haters, drinking, smoking weed, or the new one which baffles me, dancing. Are you fucking kidding me?

Asher, you had so much potential. "I Love College," is catchy. Funny. Maybe not totally original, but at least it was a breath of fresh air for a few months. And you ruined that. You made a real CD. You got the chance. You were called up to the big leagues. And you chose to make the songs "She Don't Wanna Man," "Blunt Cruisin, and "As I Am?" What a fucking joke.

Don't take me the wrong way. There are great songs about all of the topics I mentioned above, but you only make those songs if you can make them in a new way. Asher Roth does not. He fails miserably in my opinion.

Not to mention that shitty shitty shitty production of this CD. Stale is perhaps the best word. In fact the whole CD is stale. The flows, the beats, everything. If you were expecting something new and catchy from Asher Roth, you will certainly be disappointed like myself.

I saved the best for last. There's a track titled, "As I Em," which is all about how Roth is sick of being compared to Eminem. (Oh man what an awesome pun in the title of the song!) He hates it he says. He hates being interviewed about it. He's not Eminem. Ok, we get it. THEN WHY THE FUCK DOES YOUR WEBSITE PROCLAIM YOU AS THE NEXT EMINEM???!!? I'll be fair, I'm sure Roth didn't personally make his own website. But if your going to make a claim about not being Eminem, you should probably make sure your own press people aren't doing it. Maybe he'll get lucky and it will be off his website before anyone realizes what a fucking joke he is.

Oh yea though, here is the greatest Irony. His two best tracks, "Bad Day," and "Sour Patch Kids"... yea, they sound exactly like a less angry Eminem. So don't worry Asher, I don't think anyone will ever compare you to Marshall Mathers again, more like Vanilla Ice. Way to take another giant leap backwards for mainstream hip/hop.

P.s. I almost forgot. On the track "La Di Da," Roth states that Jay-Z gave him his approval. If this is true I'll probably cry.

Basketball is Poetry in Motion

An Excellent Write Up on the Bulls Celtics Series

In case you haven't been paying attention, the Celtics, Bulls series has become the most gripping and intense matchup of these early goings. Last night Ben Gordon dropped 42 while Jesus Shuttlesworth (Ray Allen) dropped 30 (28 in the second half) including a catch-and-shoot trey over the out stretched fingers of 6'11 Joakim Noah with 2 seconds left to even the series at one game apeice last night.

I am of course a frequenter of Yahoo's NBA Blog: Ball Don't Lie, and there was a great write-up about last nights game, by the blog's manager J.E. Skeets. Check it out HERE

More Than A Game

Great NBA Day.
This just popped up on Ball Don't Lie.
At last years Sundance Film Festival, a documentary about LeBron James and his high school teammates premiered. Reports I read at that time called it one of the best basketball movies ever made. Primarily filmed and directed by a student from James's high school, the film was picked up by Lionsgate and slated for distribution sometime this year. The first trailer just found its way out. Check it here

Reports said James was so touched by the film, he left the premiere in tears...

Josh Smith Soars Over the Heat

In case you missed the Atlanta Hawks blatant rape of Dwayne Wade and the Miami Heat yesterday, take a second to watch Josh Smith. Quite possibly the most athletic player in the NBA...

The Decline and Fall of American Journalism

At 11:32 pm I received this text from the CNN Breaking News Center: Ashton Kutcher is first to claim 1 Million followers in CNN Twitter contest.

I always wonder what Vonnegut and Mr. Clemens would say at times like these.

I assume it would be something along the lines of,
"So it Goes."

Indie-Pendent

Looking for some new "Heady" music to listen to? Then check this out:
Amazon's 100 Greatest Indie Rock Albums of All Time.

Sure Indie Rock carries with it that pretentious artsy-fartsy connotation, but there is some pretty decent stuff on the list.

Recommendations: titles by: TV on the Radio, Portugal the Man, Spiritulaized and Ted Leo and the Pharmacists

Snoogins

Early Brewers Observations

Things EVERYONE Know About Ricky Weeks and Corey Hart:

1. They swing at all low and outside sliders.
2. They cannot hit low and outside sliders.

Dat New "New"

So yes, I created another blog. And, like previous times before I am proclaiming to update this on a regular basis, even though I am fully aware that very few, if any people read this.

My last attempt at this, was entitled "Sometimes Nothing is a Real Cool Hand," which was of course a reference to Cool Hand Luke and of course some of my feelings on life at the time.

I thought about calling this one "So it Goes," which would have of course been a reference to Kurt Vonnegut and Slaughterhouse 5 and perhaps would have been extremely fitting considering the two year anniversary of his death was yesterday.

In the end though, I chose "Do Androids Dream of electric Sheep," which was the novel Blade Runner is based on. Although I had seen parts before, it was not until recently that I sat down and gave the film the thorough watching it deserved. It quickly jumped into my list of favorite and respected movies and in a way this the film is a tribute to Vonnegut in light of its underlying question: what is human and what defines humanity?

Blogs are always criticized and I expect this to be no different. It should be stated though, that I am not particularly writing this for other people. I have always tried to not place too much relevance on what others thought of me, but inevitably there are always people close to us whose opinion we do genuinely care about. Unfortunately, those people can come and go. If nothing else, I write this as a record. A place to archive and hopefully delay forgetting about those things that quickly pass in our lives.

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the darkness at Tan Hauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time... like tears in rain."
-Roy Batty in Blade Runner

If you've read this far, thank you. Here's the payoff. New Kid Cudi. Perhaps the release I am most excited about this upcoming summer: